Friday, January 7, 2011

Episode 52: A Year in Weeks

Well, we have been doing this now for a year in Episode Time and I think we have accomplished quite a bit. It might be good at this point to review all we have learned together and think about what exactly we may want to do and learn in the coming year (F.Y.I., in Episode Time, a year is a pretty nebulous concept related in no way whatsoever to the measuring of days, weeks, and months and such.). It might be good to do all that, but that would require me to look back at the last 51 Episodes. That is something I am just not willing to do, so we will forge ahead blindly and assume we are making progress toward some sort of future in which we will do something and be something other than what we are today or were yesterday.

I think one of the best places to look for big life lessons is not into our past, but rather at our future by watching toddlers, who have very little sense of past or future but a very good sense of fun. Here is an excerpt from one conversation between my son and daughter:

I want to kill wine.

Who is wine?

No, I said WINE.

I SAID wine. Do I look pretty?

Ya, you know I have to fight 20 bad guys so I have to get on my battle horse. Bye.

[gallops off to living room to do battle, which lasts just under a minute, and returns victorious]

Daddy, you’re home!

I am not your daddy!

But you are just pretending.

No, I’m not even pretending.

We have been working on getting them to understand it is not very nice to use words like hate or kill when talking about people, so they seem to think aiming those words at inanimate things is a good compromise. Our kids are masters at finding the loopholes by being completely illogical and absurd.

One thing they have yet to master, however, is their native language. We had to take them in to get a few shots the other day. They didn’t like it much, but they are glad that now they are safe from chicken puck, and bumps and weasels.

Okay, this is the point at which I should be thinking about tying all of this together somehow to drive home my purpose for writing this, and that purpose should be something along the lines of persuading, informing, entertaining, explaining, evaluating, or some such thing. Hmm. I am going to go with persuading. Yes, the goal of this little bit of rambling is to persuade you to use your time more wisely next time. You just wasted at least a few minutes reading this nonsense, and what has it gotten you?

Uh…hmm…that may not have been the best goal. That is the downside of doing this on the fly. Well, come back next time to hear about all the benefits of reading this nonsense on a regular basis, or something else along those lines or something completely different that will be a very productive use of your time.